Tag Archives: duck

SSSSSSmokin’!

12 Nov

November 12, 2012

SMOKIN!

Mr. B has been on his on-again, off-again bad toy kick. Which got me thinking about the BEST toy.  No, not Lincoln Logs. Not an Erector Set. Play D’Oh? NO! The best toy evah is…….

SMOKING POPEYE:                       

Yes, it’s as cool as it sounds! A Popeye that…..smokes. Fun for the family! But it really was a gentler time, when kids could actually have a toy like this. You could NEVER get this toy to market today. And it signals a sea change in the country, because there was a time when 9 out of 10 doctors endorsed smoking, and it was considered very glamorous thing to do: 

Mr. BTR has no clue who this actress is.

Hubba hubba!

But while us humans are slowly moving beyond smoking, there’s still one segment of the planet that is embracing smoking with a passion:

FUN WITH TEH INTERNETS! TODAY’S SEARCH: SMOKING ANIMALS

1)

More fun that a barrel full of smoking monkeys! Monkeys are the most intelligent animal in the kingdom aside from us, so it figures that they’ve been smoking for quite a while now. There’s also unconfirmed reports that rhesus monkeys have started playing Barry White music before they…..uh, get busy with their monkey significant others.  Smart indeed.

2) 

Now this is a very civilized goat. You can’t see it behind the fence, but he’s wearing a natty jacket with patches on the sleeves. Unfortunately, he’s smoking rum and maple blend (UGH)

3) 

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! Isn’t that just the kewtest widdle thing! If that little one needed a light from me, I’d flick my bic! We all know how much Mr. B WUVS kittehs!!!!

Speaking  of cute cats: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9kYNId_Kvbo (The White Shadow one is my favorite!)

4)

This is NOT Pierre D. Duck, the World’s Greatest Duck, who is very anti-smoking and will quack at you if you smoke. You can find the link to his Facebook page in the sidebar.

The AFLAC duck celebrates after closing on the Glengarry leads…..

5)

Now that’s one bitch that knows how to party! (See what I did there?)

6)

Um…..what? This one doesn’t make any sense, but it’s so wonderful that I don’t care! This gives me hope that I can fulfill my dream of one day seeing a dolphin take a bong hit. For now, the closest I can come to that magical day is this:

 

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Pierre D. Duck and his Fantastic Flock

22 Jun

June 22, 2010

New York Duck Press
TELEVISION REVIEW

Pierre D. Duck and his Fantastic Flock, Wednesday at 10 pm, Discoobery Channel.
by Emil C. Brown

After a week’s delay, the world premier of the Discoobery Channel’s “Duckumentary” Pierre D. Duck and his Fantastic Flock earned top ratings in it’s time period. It was the highest-rated show of the evening.

“I am so proud,” said Pierre in his odd French accent. “I am so proud of my whole wonderful family. Even the mother-in-law.”

Wearing a tuxedo and a distinguished-looking top hat, Pierre showed the Discoobery Channel around his comfortable but slightly cramped three-story nest.

“Sometimes I lose count of how many people live here. There is me, Pierre– I am Pierre, I am so great, I am the greatest duck in the world– where was I?”

Pierre sometimes likes to break into a song about himself. “It is because I am so big in show business. Did you see me in Donald Duck’s last movie? I held the door- ‘Good morning, sir!‘ That was my line.”

Pierre lives with his wife and four children, along with his two brothers and their children, all of his wife’s sisters and their children, his cousin and his family, his grandfather, mother-in-law, and many other members of his extended family.

“I love my Uncle Pierre because he is so funny. But he eats too much,” said his niece Cindy. “I like jelly beans.”

Living at home can be cramped. The Duck family also lives with Donald and Daisy Duck (no relation), the next-door family of frogs who often drop by, frequent guests Furry Murray the dog and Gus the Goose, and a pair of something called “bloops” who live in the basement and have a giant swimming pool.

“A bloop is a big swimming sea creature with lots and lots of arms,” explained Pierre. “I have known him for years.”

He has also known his friend Furry Murray for years. “I have poker games and parties, and Murray Furry, Furry Furry Murray, um the Murray Furry, is always invited.”

Life in the nest is not all parties and poker. “I work very hard. I get up every morning and make the children’s breakfast, then I clean the nest and vacuum the floors, I make the beds and last week I painted the whole nest myself. With no help.”

Pierre’s wife, Cecelia, tells a slightly different story. “See the stomach on him? Let’s just say he likes to sleep late and eat T-bone steaks. He hasn’t climbed a ladder in years.”

Pierre wasn’t always so happy. “I used to live in a bachelor apartment and I had no friends until the Pretty Lady and her fat boyfriend took me in. I owe her everything, She helped me to meet Cecelia, the love of my life, and helped me when I sat on Norman’s egg. I still take them out and treat them to dinner all the time.”

Pierre D. Duck and his Fantastic Flock will air again next week at 8 pm on the Discoobery Channel.

copyright 2010

Pierre the Duck

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