Quarantine All-Stars

22 May

May 23 2020

All of us at GOMALCO Industries care for our employees. You know us the company that brings you such housewares as Mrs. Anderson’s Industrial Nicotine For The Home, Do-It-Yourself Crime Scene Cleanup, Quik Baby Nap Inhalable Sleep Powder, and of course, Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride.

As part of our dedication to you, our valued consumer assets, we wanted to check in on the Mr. Blog Tepid Team to find out why the heck they have produced nearly no blogs this past year despite cashing their paychecks, those ungrateful  how they are coping with the recent COVID-19 situation.

We first looked in on the Editors and Staff, and assorted hangers on.

We tracked down BMJ2K “fan favorite” Norman Snackmunch. GOMALCO Industries takes no position on his lifestyle, other than to point out that as an at-will freelance employee we will not cover any health-related expenses, such as gastric bypass or an extra-wide coffin.

Another alleged favorite is Greg “Always Hammered / The Hammer” Valentine. As you may recall, he has not changed his facial expression in years.

Has the coronavirus had any effect on this man?

No it has not

Speaking of unhealthy guys who never change, we tracked down Mr. Know-It-All. It wasn’t hard, we just followed the smell.

Of course, not everyone is having a rough time of things.

I HAVE BEEN PREPARING FOR THIS MOMENT FOR YEARS!

How about the rest of our crew? Click on the thumbnails for more.

 

Allan Keyes could not be reached for comment.

GOMALCO Industries hope that you are doing well in these trying times. If you are feeling overwhelmed or find yourself in need of some help, please consider our line of GOMALCO Fine Wine And Sanitizer. Thank You.

 

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2 Responses to “Quarantine All-Stars”

  1. allenkeyes May 22, 2020 at 8:51 pm #

    What’s this virus I’m hearing about? I have no time for news, I’m too busy watching the various shows in the 90-Day Fiancée series.

    Big Ed has no neck and is a sex pest if I ever saw one. Big Pred is more like it. And Lisa makes Angela look like a demure southern belle. I’d hang out with Angela in a Saturday night, you know some hijinx would go down. Lisa is more the type to get into a bar fight with a group of men. She’s taken a roundhouse or two in her day.
    Still, as pathetic as David is, at least he beats Ceasar since David actually met his catfish.
    I’m waiting for 90 Day Fiancée – prostate surgery edition.

    So what’s this Coronabeer thing I keep reading about anyways?

    Like

    • bmj2k May 22, 2020 at 11:22 pm #

      Don’t forget Ash’s freaky serial killer eyes,

      Like

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