May 23, 2013
What am I paying taxes for if not to get my local streets fixed and properly repaired? If I lived in England I would be very upset.
This is an egregious breach of the public trust. This could be bad- very bad. ANYTHING could come through that portal- Roman Centurions, anal-probing aliens from Betelgeuse, even an other-dimensional Kanye West where he is pregnant with Kim Kardashian’s baby. Frankly, I can’t have that.
And the snake? Is no one else concerned that it could be Jörmungandr, the Midgard Serpent of Norse mythology whose final battle with Thor will be fought at Ragnarök? This could be the end, ladies and gentlemen. You may be reading the last installment of Mr. Blog’s Tepid Ride and, indeed, everything else as well.
So I say goodbye, internet public. Goodbye world. So long to all that I have known. This vortex is going to be the end of us all.
And the local Brighton officials will have no one else to blame when the pregnant Kanye West comes after them.
May 20, 2013
Feel like watching a crudely animated and simplistic movie? Well, check this bad boy out:
Sure, it looks like the kind of stop motion movie that I could make, if I could ever improve my artistic skills to the level of a drunken adolescent gorilla. But look again – this is stop motion based on moving around FRICKING ATOMS.
How freaking awesome is this??! This really is getting to level of playing god now. You see this thing happening, how long from that………to this:
Ooops, I didn’t mean that…..well, maybe a little. Jason Statham is only a little below Vin Diesel on the dreamy scale! Anyway, really I meant this:
Seeing stories like this, or about things like Virgin Galactic really piss me off, because I know that we’re on the cusp of a whole host of game changing things that I can see coming, and unless they invent a cybernetic colon I doubt I’ll really be around to fully see and enjoy it. All those that will get to live with these wonders will be my kids and grandkids, and really – eff them, the little rotters. They never call and they can’t stay off my lawn.
Think about it – who among us remembers how things were before the internet? I imagine that’s how things will be once this atom moving process gets fully realized, because doubtless there’s lots of ways this can go that aren’t being considered yet, such as these:
I like that last one the best. Goatees = HARDCORE.
May 10, 2013
We’re going in a different direction with The Imponderable this week. I’m bringing you a pair of ridiculous game show clips.
The first clip is from The Price is Right and features a contestant making a bid that even Bob Barker won’t accept and gives him a do-over. In the second, semi-non-celeibrity-ish person Kelly Pickler.
Just as an aside, I am sure that somewhere in the country, a morning zoo show is using the clip of Bob Barker announcing “Our top winner in the showcase is Gay!” in a funny yet highly inappropriate manner which Mr. Blog finds totally offensive and hysterical.
Can she be that stupid?
The question is, well no, sorry, not Imponderable, but likely yes.