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Fun With Really Bad Photoshop: Superman

18 May

May 18, 2015

The two or three surviving regular readers of this blog (used to be six, sorry about the bird flu) know that I am terrible with Photoshop. I am so terrible that I put it in italics, and you know that’s bad. How bad is it? My Photoshop skills are so bad that I don’t even have Photoshop! That’s right, all the lousy Photoshop is actually lousy Paint.

Anyway, I was surfing the net looking for porn doing research for my Master’s thesis in advanced quantum theory when I came across a panel from a Silver Age issue of Superman. Back then, Superman had such powers as super-ventriloquism, super-kiss (lucky Lois!) and the ability to rip a cellophane version of his symbol off his chest and smother a super-villain, for a second or two, until it disappears leaving no ill-effects. Seriously, Superman II, what were you thinking?

Well, he also had a super-sneeze, one which was so powerful that he could destroy whole solar systems. Why they didn’t bring that back in the New 52 is beyond me.

Anyway, it just seemed to me that a super-sneeze is silly, but with a little Photoshop trickery (very little) I could make that same power, with just a little tweak, very funny.

silly funny

How about that? Seamless! You’d hardly know that I am the Photoshop user equivalent of a one-armed spider monkey.

But seriously, or at least as seriously as you can take a discussion of Superman farting, isn’t it logical that if Superman’s body could generate the pressure to release a super-sneeze, it could also release a super-fart?

DC really needs to explore this.

.

The Saturday Comics: Alley Oop, May 2015

16 May

May 16, 2015

Saturday Comics likes to check in on classic strips and see how they are faring in the modern age. Alley Oop began in 1932 and is still lurching along, I checked in on it in 2011 and again in 2012. I wasn’t impressed. In fact, in 2011 I was convinced they had stooped so as low as to be ripping me off! (And if you are ripping off Mr. Blog’s Tepid Timewaster, that’s low.)

Before going on, it would be very helpful to you to read that 2012 run, as it is very similar to this week’s run. Just click here.

Back then, I complained that it was slow moving and really, nothing much happened in that series. Now let’s see what’s happening right now, in the weeks ending with May 15. I can’t wait!

oop 2015

Please note that I have no copyright or ownership of Alley Oop, nor is any implied.

Well that sucked.

Talk about long goodbyes! OK, I had the misfortune to come in at the end of a storyline, but how long is it going to take to start the next one? I think nine days is long enough to get moving, especially considering that the majority of the strips are concerned with characters who are leaving the storyline, and presumably won’t be seen again, or at least for quite some time.

But man, nine days? Do I really want to stick around? No I do not.

And to make matters worse, here is the Sunday strip that went in the middle of all that.

Alley Oop Comic

Seriously?

Wow, I could have skipped all the dailies and just read the Sunday strip. Some strips have separate Sunday stories, some continue the weekly story, this one is just a recap! (And the art is recycled from the weeklies too.)

This strip used to be huge. What the heck happened? Dick Tracy still manages to be a fun and well-written strip after all these years so I can’t blame age. I think this strip (and yes, this is a very limited view of the strip) needs an injection of new blood.

I’ll check back in another three years. I’m sure that by then Oop will be, well, probably about the same.

I’ve Seen That Hamburglar Before

9 May

May 9, 2015

McDonald’s, in an attempt to become hip and adult, unveiled the newest version of its children’s cartoon character, the Hamburglar.

150506164132-mcdonalds-hamburglar-780x439

                                    Nope, nothing creepy here, move along.

Wait, a minute, I know him! I know who that is! Alert Mayor McCheese! Wake up Officer Big Mac! I am about to blow the lid off of this! Get my reward ready!

The new Hamburglar is the WWE’s own Repo Man!

Believe it or not, this man was once part of Demolition

                                Believe it or not, this man was once part of Demolition

However, Grimace remains at large.

 

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