November 26, 2014
This is to all of you who are complaining about stores being open on Thanksgiving.
Stop blaming the stores. Thousands of people line up hours before the shops open, skipping food, sleep, and basic human comforts just to get a cheap TV. Blame them.
If thousands of people lined up outside of your house and waved money at you, what would you do? You’d open your door and invite them in for coffee. So until people stop sacrificing their humanity for a shot at a bargain on an iPad, leave the stores alone.
November 18, 2014
Your Daily Horoscope: November 18th, 2014
- Aries: Today will be a good day to indulge your hidden desires, but not in public! That sort of thing is still illegal in this country.
- Taurus: You will come into money today! A Nigerian Prince will contact you about transferring a large sum of money out of his country. Be sure to give him your social security number.
- Gemini: The moon is in the second house. See loser? Even the moon can afford two houses, and you still live your parent’s basement.
- Cancer: You will get cancer. HA! Just kidding!
- Leo: Avoid using deodorant today. This will keep your boss from approaching you with extra work.
- Virgo: Today will be a great day to email a Taurus while pretending to be a Nigerian Prince.
- Libra: Today is your lucky day! If you’re hoping your wife will ask for a divorce, that is.
- Scorpio: You might want to consider getting a cool tattoo on your face, just like Mike Tyson.
- Sagittarius: Magic 8 Ball says: YES
- Capricorn: You will meet a handsome stranger. His name is Jeph. You will dislike him intensely.
- Aquarius: If you know anyone who is a Taurus, don’t let on that I’m just screwing with him about that whole Nigerian Prince thing, OK?
- Pisces: Insert your own “Uranus is ascending” joke.
November 16, 2014
Thanksgiving is not far off. So what do some Mr. Blog luminaries feel about the holiday?